why now? why me?...

So you couldn't really write this....or could you? I almost feel as if he can read my every thought sometimes. After putting the goodbye up the other day, I felt it was appropriate for where I was in my life, I know I am to move on. Then today...after 3 months of not speaking to him at all (if we had spoke it was mainly because I had started the conversation off), he messages me. I was literally gobsmacked and I immediately messaged back. At first I thought he must want something or need to know something but he actually had a normal conversation with me and my body just exploded. Literally fireworks went off in every possible place and I had one of them stupid big smiles all over my face, I was giddy, I looked a fool and my friend was telling me to calm down. She said my smile was ridiculous and why am I messaging him back so quick. I could not help it, it was like all this time, more specifically the 3 months I have had zero contact with him had gone out the window, and I was back to being the puppy in love and couldn't have been more lapped up by everything he said. Whyyyyyy did this happen?!? I am obviously not over him in any way shape or form, I have just been trying to convince myself. All them feelings just came flooding back and my mind went into overdrive, I just thought of everything there was to think about, why is he texting? will he want to speak again? does this mean he is thinking of me? why now? Arghhhh. I couldn't concentrate in my last lecture of the day because all I wanted to do was talk to him, he had offered me an olive branch and I was taking it all in, piece by piece. The conversation flowed, it was nice to talk to him again however it didn't take long before it felt like the conversation was forced, like how it usually is. I began thinking was he just texting me cause he was bored? If so why did I fall for that so easily and put my all into messaging him back and wanting to know what he has been up to. He might have genuinely been busy but then why didn't he say so? See I overthink everything and  I just end up making myself feel worse, so what started with an buzz going through every inch of my body has ended in a baffled state of mind now, I am not quite sure why he did that. Did he message me then remember he shouldn't be doing this and so he decided to try and cut it short? I have no idea and I guess I will never know, however because of this I am going to have to try so so hard tomorrow, or the next day not to start a conversation with him now. Was that what he was doing? testing me? How am I going to sleep tonight with all this in my head. I know it is my fault for allowing him to do it but he obviously means that much to me that my heart or mind will not let him go no matter how hard I try. I am still clinging on to the hope that we could maybe try again one day, when our lives are less hectic and we know what we want.